You Have Kids. I Have a Dog.

Go Fly a Kite

Guess what I haven't done in years, well up until yesterday?

Ok so we finally got to the kite store while it was open (3rd time is a charm) and it was super windy yesterday so we went and flew a kite. It went really high.



And it even worked really low...



It is a viking ship in case you are wondering. After kite flying we got lost leaving because the road out of the park was closed so we had to take this windy back way through a sketchy neighborhood of multi-million dollar gated homes but don't worry... We made it out alive.

Oh THATS why it is stupid. I never knew.

I would like to state for the record that I do not want to get into some philosophical debate for or against abortion. What I want to do is share with you the dumbest paragraph I have read in a REALLY long time.

This was on a facebook discussion forum entitled, Abortion (stupid) and this was the opening discussion topic.

"Abortion,(if you think about it) is good and bad ( Mostly bad but...). For instance it is good if an innocent women is raped and doesn't want the baby of a crook. But it is bad because this is giving an unfair chance of life. Even if the baby the survives abortion, it don't have near as many rights as one that wasn't. So, because I am a strong Christian I am going against the law."

What? When I began reading it I was annoyed by the fact that apparently John Major believes that non-innocent women who are raped must keep their babies but that is merely opinion and I stated before that I wasn't posting this to start a debate on the issue. PLUS, I didn't what kind of idiot goldmine lay ahead.

Let's repeat one of the sentences because it bears repeating: "Even if the baby the survives abortion, it don't have near as many rights as one that wasn't." Not only does this genius think that fetuses (not babies yet) survive abortions but they somehow have fewer rights than ones that weren't aborted.

I think the part that really kills me is that there were 865 responses to this comment and after scanning the first hundred or so NO ONE tell this guy he is retarded if he thinks babies survive abortions AND have fewer rights that ones that aren't aborted. Seriously people, what is the internet coming to if no one tells you that you are stupid?

On top of that his grammar is atrocious.

I am not prepared for this sort of thing.

So growing up in Santa Barbara there is something that remains constant: The Weather. You really know that it isn't going to change much and if it is going to change you usually have about two weeks notice. This is not so in Texas. In Texas (at least in my experience) no weather report is accurate more than like six hours in advance and even then you should really plan for anything. Case in point, yesterday.

At 11am I walked my dog wearing a t-shirt, jeans, and flip-flops. I was hot. I contemplated turning on the AC in the house because it was warm and humid. I did use my AC while driving to school and it was very refreshing.

At 11pm, a mere 12 hours later, it was snowing. Yes, snowing.

It is all mine now!

Okay so on Friday one girl from my work ummm lets say was "laidoff" since that seems to be what she is telling people and one of my bosses moved to New Mexico. I know what you are thinking: "But what does this mean for you, Victoria??" Well let me tell you, it means that I now have a new flat panel widescreen monitor, new speakers, a new wireless keyboard and mouse, and a new electric stapler.

I wasn't going to take the wireless keyboard and mouse and the speakers just yet because the chick was supposed to come in and finish things up and I didn't want her to think that I was callously taking advantage of her circumstances but she hasn't been in yet today (it is almost 4pm) and as one friend pointed out; I already stole her job is she really going to care about a keyboard and mouse that she doesn't even own? We're going with no, she isn't going to care.

OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD

Cross Your Fingers! It would be really awesome to see how Rob Thomas would have closed the show, though I really like my ending.

Enrico Colantoni Updates fans on the possibility of a movie....

Me Can Investigate Too Mom. Mom! Mom! Look! Mom!

There is definitely something I love about Austin. Austin is a big enough city that the local news feels the need to investigate things but it isn't a big enough city for there to be interesting or exciting things to investigate. So this is what we get to hear on the radio. Read the following in one of those voices just absolutely oozes gravitas.

CBS News Eye on Austin Investigates.

We were there when the truth came out... City employees driving city vehicles home at night...

Sometimes... out of the city limits.

different man's voice: "of course we do, everybody does it."

Now. CBS Eye on Austin Investigator Nanci Wilson sits down with City Manager Marc Ott to get the details.

Nanci Wilson: "Is this really an appropriate use of taxpayer dollars?"

Tonight a six.

Are You Calling Me Fat?

I had Thai food with my boss for lunch today and all was going well until we were finished and waiting for the check. The waiter comes over to get our plates and says the following:

*to my boss
"Wow! Cleaned your plate, way to go!"
*Then turns to me
"And you! Like a champ! You're totally keeping up!"

Umm excuse me? Was I not supposed to finish my lunch? Do normal people leave food on their plate when they order this? Are you calling me fat?

Sorry Simon

Yesterday Simon had to go to the vet for his annual check-up and shots. Mommy forgot to bring a stool sample so they had to go in and get one. Judging by the noise he made that is less pleasant than you think it is.

We went to the pet store for a post-vet treat. Here he is with his "sorry you got poked in the butt" toy.


Also, in other news, I'm a bad puppy mom. Before the vet I mentioned going there for a post-vet treat and Kailey asked if I would get some dog food since we were almost out. I immediately agreed and then after a pause realized that we had switched their food to something new and I had no idea what they ate now. Yeah, I had to ask my roommate what kind of food my dog eats. niiiiice.

I realize that the smartest people don't work in pet stores for a living because they can do other things (I worked in a pet store but I was 16. And smart.) but come on...really?

Cashier: Do you have a petco pals card?
Me: No. Can I have one?
Cashier: What? oh yeah, here. *hands me one of the free treats on the counter*
Me: No, one of the petco cards, can I get one of those?
Cashier: Huh? Sure, they are all right over there. *points to gift card display*
Me: Umm. No, one of the pals cards, the discount cards?
Cashier: OOOhh. Sorry. *hands me the form to fill out*

In my defense I had to go to petco because petsmart doesn't have Natural Balance (the food my dog eats apparently) and there really aren't any locally owned stores to go to.

John Williams Gets Better

Can someone please explain to me when a capella suddenly became cool? Have I become old and uncool? Is that why I find this awesome?



For the record, the guy in the video is only lip syncing to the a capella group moosebutter. I've heard that perhaps one of you knows one of the illustrious members of moosebutter..... (seeing as how they all got their start at BYU, except the one who went to U of U).

I'm so horrified I can't even blog. Every sentence I begin to type comes out without spaces because my mind can't even process word breaks.

I am disappointed and ashamed to say that I come from California. I am disappointed and ashamed to say I voted in California. I am disappointed in 5.4 million people.

Most of those 5.4 million people voted that way becaues of their religion. I guess I thought we lived in a place where YOUR religion doesn't affect MY life. I guess I thought that a freedom OF religion also somehow implied a freedom FROM religion. I guess I was wrong.

This just seems SO un-American to me. A majority voting to ELIMINATE rights from a monority????? That is absurd.

I can't type anymore.

The burger to end all burgers

It is amazing how quickly you get out of the habit of blogging.

So for the last couple of months Michael has been going on about this Awesome Burger and how he just HAS to make it because it sounds like the best thing ever. I was skeptical but we finally went to the store and got all the ingredients and made the Awesome Burger last weekend.

It looked like this in the end:


What you see there is meat, cheese, avocado, jalapeno, bacon, spicy mustard, and a fried egg (did I miss anything?). I know what you're thinking, you were loving it until the fried egg, now you're not so sure. I wasn't either, which is why my burger consisted of simply meat, cheese, bacon and bbq sauce. You also might be thinking, wow that is kind of a big burger. YOU HAVE NO IDEA....


On the left is my burger and it is normal burger sized, not small, no a normal sized burger on a normal sized bun on the right is the Monster Awesome Burger. He said it was the best burger he had ever had in his entire life so those of you adventurous burger eaters might want to give it a try. I suggest making it normal sized though because after eating this he had to lie down for a while.

Things that Make You go "Hm"

I saw the following during my travels today.

1. An 86 year old WWII Vet (according to the sign) begging for money on a street corner while talking on his cell phone.

2. A police car with a boot on the tire.

Just Say No! (to Prop 8)

I realize that it has been a while, I've been busy! I'll post some new apartment updates in a bit but first, something serious and boring.

Since one of my friends decided to post her opinion on the subject it prompted me to write my own. There aren't a whole lot of things that go on politically that I have strong opinions about but my two real biggies are Gay Marriage and Abortion. One of those is a hot topic in the news right now (especially in CA), guess which one I'm writing about. Go on, guess. The following is totally un-researched, and is 100% my personal opinion on the subject. I have no real religious or legal education.

We are going to ignore my whiny, socially liberal tendencies and I'm not just going to sit here and talk about fairness and equality (thought it will come up a little bit), but instead I'd like to address one argument that I hear a lot. Gay Marriage should be outlawed because Marriage is a Religious Institution.

At one time marriage was a strictly religious institution but I would argue that it is no more. Marriages are licensed by the government, performed by government officials, and entered into by non-religious people. Married people are treated differently by the government; taxed differently and given different rights that include deciding the fate of their spouse. I would even argue that the fact that a law is needed to define Marriage makes marriage not a strictly religious institution. I don't see the government deciding who and when you can get baptized, confirmed, or bar & bat mitzvahed.

My second argument is that not all religions are opposed to gay marriage. I see a lot of rabbis performing same-sex marriages. Why does Christianity get to define marriage for all religions?

If religions would like to define what marriage is, then they should be petitioning the government to have marriage removed entirely from its vocabulary but as long as the Government is involved in Marriage, then everyone needs to be treated equally.

Ok, I'm done.

Everything except what I need? Really?

I am the first to admit that I am a teensy bit anal retentive about some things. One of those things is drawing graphs. I need my axes to be straight, perpendicular, and the increments must be of equal size on the x and y. If that doesn't happen I will just erase and continue to redraw the axes until those conditions are met. I know this about myself and so I choose to do math on graph paper because it is a lot easier to draw perpendicular, straight lines when there are perpendicular, straight lines printed on the page for you.

Why is buying graph paper so hard?

What I want:
- Ringed Notebook style, with perforated paper for easy tear-out. (there are MILLIONS of regular lined notebooks like this)
- 4 square per inch graph lines (the perfect size I have found)

That is not asking a lot, but after scouring three different aisles (on more than one occasion, in more than one store) and finding one tiny section of graph paper on each aisle this is what I have for choices:

- Ringed notebook style with perforated edges and 4sq/in on one side but 5 sq/in on the other side. (why would someone want two different sizes?)

- Pad of paper style with 4sq/in on one side and wide ruled lines on the other side. (who even uses wide ruled paper??? and what can you write on lines that you can't write on graph paper??)

- Ringed notebook style, no perforation, with 5sq/in on both sides and paper is 8x10.5in. (why are some notebooks slightly smaller than normal paper size? Who does that help?)

- Ringed notebook style, no perforation, with 10sq/in on both sides and paper is 8x10.5in. (seriously, 10?).

- Pad of paper style with 10sq/in on both sides. (we are just getting less and less helpful here).

- Ringed notebook style, with perforations, 4sq/in on both sides. Wait, ohmygod, this is it, they do have it!! Ummm, why isn't the paper white????? You have to be kidding me, tan? Why would I want a notebook filled with tan paper???

argh! If you are wondering I went with the tan paper even though it annoys me.

Almost a Good Day?

So today, if it happened last week, would be a good day but nothing about this week or any days in it are good so we're going with almost good.

Reasons:

1. I didn't have to use my AC in the car this morning driving to work, in fact I thought about turning on the heat. (For those of you in CA: Yes, for the last 5 months I've had to use AC while driving the one mile to work at 7:30 in the morning because it is that stupidly freaking hot here).

2. Just found out that ABC picked up a new show for midseason called Castle. Why do we care? Why because of the show's star, of course. My birthday sharing man, Nathan Fillion.

3. It is like 2:15pm and I haven't broke down crying yet today. Most of you know the reasons behind that, those of you who don't can ask someone who does because I don't want to talk about it.

Sometimes School Makes My Head Hurt

Though probably not for the reason you might think. Observe the following conversation that I overheard while packing up from class tonight:

Girl: Ohmygod I am going to be so drunk ALL weekend. I've been WAITING for oktoberfest.
Guy: I know what you mean, I love drunk holidays. Wait, isn't St. Patrick's Day coming up?
Girl: Ohmygod, you're so stupid. hahahaha.
Guy: When is it?
Girl: March 14th. DUH!

Guess what I did on Sunday!

I went to six flags and youou didn't. I mean, unless you are Michael, then you went to six flags Sunday too.

Before you start, no I didn't take any pictures, yes I had my camera with me but I didn't take it out once. In my defense I would like to say the following things: (1) Michael will do something funny right up until the moment I aim a camera at him, then I get nothing. (2) Mostly I forgot I had it.

We had a lot of fun. It is weird being at another six flags, they have a lot of the same rides as Magic Mountain in California but they have different names. Goliath here is Batman there - it is the same ride, I kid you not. Same manufacturer, height, length, and number of drops, twists, and loops. I looked it up. I think our communal favorite was Roadrunner Express (no Magic Mountain equivalent but reminded me of a more thrilling version of Thunder Mountain Railroad), especially when, after the first drop, the grown woman behind us starts squealing to her 8 year old son about how he told her this was a kiddie ride and he basically laughed at her. Classic. Later on in the day I saw them again and heard her tell him that he could go sit in the car for all she cares, maybe he tricked her again.

They also have the rapids ride where you and like 8 other people sit in a big tube and hope yours isn't the side the goes under the waterfall. Ours was the side. The white tank top I wore seemed like a good idea right up until that moment.

We went on all the biggies except Tony Hawk (which broke down as we were sitting in it waiting for our turn to go) and the Rattler which is tall. Like really really really tall and I was too scared. My least favorite part of roller coasters is the up part, I don't find the fun and anticipation builds during that time, mostly the dread and nausea builds during that time and the up part of the Rattler was really really long. This is also why I don't do Ferris Wheels. I don't care that the Ferris Wheel is rated "Mild" it is basically all "up" only half the time you are going down but not in any sort of fun or exciting way, more of a slow and excruciating way. Mostly I'd like to thank Michael for not giving me a hard time about not going on the Rattler even though I could tell he really wanted to. Maybe next time - I mean probably not and you really shouldn't get your hopes up because it really isn't going to happen, but maybe! I enjoyed Poltergeist which has no up part :o)

It is amazing how quickly you can ride all the rides when there is no line, like two hours in, we had done almost all of them, weird. Although it was nice to be able to ride some things again without worrying that you were losing your chance to go on something new. The longest lines we encountered were at the Tube/Waterfall ride and the Scooby Doo Haunted Mansion, which yes, is a kiddie ride.

We also got season passes, so sometime in the next 15 months we are definitely going again :o)

Proud to be an Amercian

Yeah, I checked the bottle, it should be Pure American.

Ahh, The Great Depression

Being a quasi Washington Mutual customer I was intrigued (but not surprised) to hear about last night's government takeover and subsequent sale to JP Morgan Chase. I realize that the current banking crisis is a bad thing but for some reason I find the following hilarious.

From a list of helpful hints to Washington Mutual customers: "If you had an account with Washington Mutual Bank yesterday, you now have an account with JPMorgan Chase Bank."

k, thanks.

Stupid mosquito bit me six times this morning before I finally killed it. It is very difficult to sleep in when something is trying to eat you alive. It is especially disconcerting when you really feel as though you've sealed yourself in under the blanket and then he manages to get the back of your neck, of course, that was his downfall. Stupid mosquitos.

You Too & Saturday Night

Once again my life resembles a Brian Regan bit. The video isn't at all important, just the audio portion.



Last night Michael and I were at the store and the clerk says, "thank you" and I say, "have a good night" and Michael follows up with, "you too." I laughed at him. Then this afternoon I'm on the phone booking a flight and at the end the woman says, "Thank you, have a good flight." I immediately followed with, "Thanks, you too." dammit! I just hung up, she has all my personal information so if she chose to laugh at me she could find me and do so.

Also on saturday night we drove by some hookers. Michael wouldn't turn around so that I could get a picture of Texas hookers for you. Then I realized that I'm probably the only girlfriend who asks her boyfriend to drive slowly by the strip club and hookers so she can get a picture. such is my life.

AND, I saw a used car lot called Honest Engine Pre-Loved Cars. I don't know why I love that so much. Possibly because it sounds a lot like "honest injun" and I don't think he can in any way guarantee that all those cars were loved. If they loved them so much why did they get rid of them? huh? yeah, thats what I though.

South Austin

We currently live in South Austin, like SOUTH Austin, like we shouldn't really be considered to be living in Austin but we are. To demonstrate, we are moving 4 miles north and we will still be living in South Austin, not even the northern part of South Austin, kinda the middle of South Austin.

This morning there was a family of deer eating seeds and grass in our parking lot (which is just an unpaved open lot), I tried to get my camera out to illustrate this blog post with but then they were scared off by the guy down the street driving his riding mower to the corner store for his mid-morning coffee and newspaper, which he does every day.

So yeah, we don't really live in the city.

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means"

You really don't realize just how many definitions of the words "nice" there are until you start looking for a couch on craigslist.

Described as "Great Contemporary Couch"


Where did these couches come from? Are people still buying these new or have they all been hanging around since the 70's???


"Nice Southwestern Style Couch!!" (that is an oxymoron if you ask me)


So the reason that we are looking for a new couch is that we found a new apartment that we will be moving into next month. Our new apartment is very pretty (hardwood floors, crown molding, granite counter tops, cherry cabinets, etc.), our couch is a southwestern style couch found by the side of the road (don't judge, we're poor) and are now just covering with a blanket because it hurts the eyes to look at. I think you can see the discrepancy here.

If you know anyone who is getting rid of a couch in the Austin area I call dibs! I mean, unless it is ugly. We already have one of those.

Just as an aside, can we take a moment to discuss the difference between "sell" and "sale"??? You put something up for SALE because you want to SELL it. I know this is the south (ish) and a lot of words sound the same because of accents but those are actually two different words. Thanks.

I don't remember whose idea it was to take both calculus and organic chemistry at the same time (mine) but that person needs a stern talking to.

Just the quantity of things that are supposed to be in my brain that I can see I will need is quite daunting. The first tests in both classes are coming up and they are both at least 75% review so I should already have that in my brain (riiiiiiiight). But going forward... eek!

Ike Evacuations

As I'm sure many of your have probably read or heard Hurricane Ike hit Texas yesterday. Original estimates had it heading towards Austin and because of it people, you know, prepared by buying up all the gas, canned goods and water. In the end it went east of Austin and our "hurricane" was a little bit of wind and about 10 drops of rain. I've definitely had much worse weather since living here.

One thing we do have is a lot of evacuees from Houston and Galveston since they were hit very hard. Luckily the strip club is here to help.

HA HA You're Old

So at work I am frequently made fun of because I am about 15 years younger than the next youngest and 35 years younger than the oldest. To get back at them I sometimes like to make them feel old.

(for the record, of COURSE I know who Paul Newman is and, though I have never seen it, I know that line is from that movie)

Boss: Haven't you seen Cool Hand Luke?
Me: I don't think so.
Boss: There is this line, "What we have here, is a failure to communicate."
Me: Oh, that's why you always say it weird.
Boss: The movie takes place in the south.
Me: Ah
Boss: Stars Paul Newman. You know who Paul Newman is right?
Thoughtful Pause
Me: The salad dressing guy?
Stares at me like I'm way too young to understand, then leaves the room.

Bear with Me

Mommy, do you remember that one time we ate at Red Robin and everything with our waiter was "not a problem"??

us: can I get some ketchup?
him: not a problem
us: thanks
him: not a problem
*brings ketchup
us: thank you
him: not a problem

Yeah I'm totally on the phone with another one of those right now. Trying to upgrade all the cell phones for work and any time she needs to type something in or bring something up, I have to "bear with [her]."

I give her our account number
Her: bear with me for one minute.

her: okay bear with me for one minute while i look that up.
her: bear with me it will just take a second
her: bear with me
*hold music
her: bear with me
*hold music
her: okay your order is processed, just bear with me while I get your confirmation number.
her: bear with me

I really wish I had kept a tally, If only I had known when we started talking.

Oh yeah, and the conversation ended like this:
Me: Since we can't upgrade that one line, what is the cheapest phone we can buy?
Her: Bear with me a moment. The i265.
Me: And that costs?
Her: Bear with me a moment. $149.99.
Me: Ok, I'll take one of those too.
Her: It has been discontinued, we can no longer order it. [notice there was no "bear with me a moment" that is because she said it matter-of-factly and instantly, no apology, no "my mistake," just they don't make it any more.]
Me: Helpful. What is the cheapest phone I can get that ISN'T discontinued.
Her: Bear with me a moment.
Me: Yeah

To Clarify a Tad....

It is a school/career decision.

I am not pregnant, getting married, moving significantly, or getting a sex change operation.

What Just Happened?

I think I made the decision guys. So over the last two years I've made a lot of changes and a lot of decisions; quit my job, moved to Texas, went back to school, etc. All of those decisions, when made, seemed like a step in the right direction, like I was making my way towards the big decision but that I hadn't quite figured out what the big decision was. Well now I think I found it and I think I made it. I'm at about 95% sure so I'm not quite ready to share with the world (though some of you have heard). Anyway, I feel a lot calmer now and I feel like I can see the road ahead which is a big change from even two weeks ago.

Basically when I made the decision to go back to school I had some ideas about where I wanted that to take me but mostly I was hoping something would pop out at me. About six weeks ago I got a a flash of something that became an inkling which turned into an idea which was then rejected immediately. Like most ideas, it didn't go away even though I told it to and that idea turned into a possibility that was then researched before becoming a holy shit moment of "by jove I think she's got it!"

So I am finally starting to feel like I'm on my way. I'll share more in the coming months when I become more comfortable with the decision (I'm still not quite sure what to think because it came a bit out of left field). For now lets all just be happy that I think I've found my way.

Randomness

Ok, it has been a little while. I have a couple blogs poking around in my head but I have to go to class in 15 minutes so what you are going to get is a glance at the randomness of my life.

This appeared in my house, you might think this odd but it isn't nearly as odd as when Cinderella showed up demanding money and complaining that she had been waiting in a hotel room for hours. And no, I am not making that up.


Also, when you have a community laundry sometimes you get extra stuff in your laundry. Sometimes it is a t-shirt that says "An akward morning beats a boring night anytime" (now Kailey's) and sometimes you get panties that say "Jason" on them. Why would girl's panties say Jason on them???

I found a new thing to hate...

It is called circling for parking. Incessantly circling for parking. As if taking CALCULUS at NIGHT after working ALL DAY isn't bad enough, now I have to leave early to circle downtown waiting to pounce on a parking spot that I then have to parallel park into.

Ok so I grew up in a place where "circling for parking" means going up a level in the parking garage, I am not accustomed to this and those of you who know me know my hatred for driving so I think you can sense my displeasure. And I would be willing to take a bus but my class gets out at 9pm, sorry, I'm not getting on a bus for 30=40 minutes at 9pm when I could be home in 20 driving my car... that is if I can remember where I parked.

Texas has nothing but land. I don't care what Joni Mitchell says. Pave this "paradise" and put up a parking lot.

owie

I had kind of a Brian Regan experience yesterday. He does a bit about deciding whether or not to call an ambulance on himself. I wasn't at that point (there was no way I was wasting money on an ambulance) but I was at the point where I was deciding if I needed to go to the emergency room. I had the following discussion with myself:

IT HURTS!!!
you have crappy insurance and no money.
IT HURTS!!!
you barely made it home, how are you going to drive to the hospital?
IT HURTS!!!
if you move, you'll throw up.
IT HURTS!!!
maybe it will hurt less later...

The lowercase letters won out. I didn't go to the emergency room and I did feel better later and am much feeling better today. I'm hoping whatever it was wasn't triggered by the classroom I was in when it started because that is going to add an unnecessary level of stress to Organic Chemistry.

Have you ever had to make that decision for yourself? Up until this point that decision has always been made by my parents. In hindsight they made good decisions, one surgery, 11 stitches, and a necessary morphine induced sleep but let me tell you, it is not the choice you should be making on your own.

Mommy, if you had answered your phone you would have heard this story yesterday. Daddy, I didn't call you because you would have told me to go to the ER and the lowercase letters had already won that argument.

To end this on a funny note, here is the Brian Regan sketch.

I came across this recently and have to say that it is probably my favorite performance of The Star Spangled Banner, it is really beautiful. Ironically this is a couple of months before the Dixie Chicks were branded as traitors for expressing displeasure in our President.



Okay so I found this reading someone else's blog about their favorite performances and while watching the others on the list all I could think was how come every superbowl national anthem concludes with a flyover?

Learning

I learned three very important things in school today.

1. The downtown campus has zero (none, zilch, nada) parking spaces for students.
2. A lot of students take evening classes so be prepared to park far far away.
3. Calculus starts at 7:05 not 7:25.

Learning is fun!

Seriously?

Me: "[company name], this is Victoria."
Customer: "Hi Victoria, wait, is this Becky?"
Me: "No, this is Victoria."
Customer: "Oh, ok Victoria can I talk to Becky?"

I'm not sure if it is summer vacation that has fried my brain or perhaps it hasn't fully recovered from the semester but...

This morning I put a box of light bulbs in the freezer and carried a bag of bagels all the way down the hallway to put in the closet.

Four Square Anyone?

Who remembers Four Square? Damn that was a fun game, it really only sucked when you had to chase the ball all the way across the playground. I remember four square being the thing in like 5th and 6th grade, we played handball before that and again at the end of 6th grade for nostalgic reasons. My school had like four regular sized courts and one giant court. The giant court was where you wanted to be so we would always designate one person to eat lunch fast who then had to get a ball and go claim the court for the rest of us.

I was reading the Four Square Wikipedia page and this line is both hilarious and incredibly true.

"A player [may be eliminated if he/she] violates a special rule. Four square is known for its many spontaneous rules."

It would be amazing how many special rules you could come up with in order to get people out when you wanted your friend in.

Grown-up life needs recess.

Handball? Who Knew?

So apparently Handball is not what I thought it was. I thought it was you know like you played in elementary school, a court with a wall and play against one other person. I thought it had a slightly higher level of difficulty in that it was played with a ball a couple inches in diameter versus one of those big red balls about a foot in diameter that we used in school but I figured the basic principle was the same.

Turns out it is a team sport that looks like a way more exciting version of soccer (because soccer is boring as hell except for during the 2 out of 1000 minutes that someone actually manages to score a goal). Too bad the US doesn't have a team so I could care how it turns out because I would totally watch that sport.

Happy Birthday Kailey!!!

I hope you enjoyed your trip to Sea World. Who knew they had roller coasters now?

I am not Canadian - not that there is anything wrong with that

I have this thing, I don’t know what to call it, rarely is it a problem, usually it just makes me feel like a jerk and hope that others didn’t notice it. I mimic people. Not in a mean way, I just automatically match my speech pattern to theirs or start saying certain words with their accent. The accent thing only happens with English-Speaking accents. I have never – that I know of – begun mimicking a foreign language accent. I really hope I have never done that.

For example, there is a woman in Canada who absolutely refuses to believe that I was not born and raised in Ontario because apparently I left her a voicemail in which I “sounded Canadian.” Despite telling her many times that I have never even been to Canada and rarely speak to Canadians she doesn’t believe me. I know what happened, upon listening to her outgoing message I immediately used the same patterns and words and inflections that she did. After leaving the message I knew I had done it, I just didn’t think it would turn into a 15 minute conversation about how I wasn’t Canadian.

So like I said, this is rarely an actual problem. It does become a problem when I do something like watch two seasons of The Wire in under a week. Let’s just say that my language has gone down hill in the last couple of days. I’m trying to control it, but sometimes it slips out. For those of you who have to speak to me in the upcoming days, I apologize in advance for my language but remember one thing, no matter what you hear, it was worse in my head.

I'm Not Laughing

You know what wasn't funny the first time and still isn't funny the 50th time?

*Ring Ring*
Me: "[company name], this is Victoria"
Co-worker: "This is an obscene phone call." *heavy breathing*

I Have a Confession to Make

I freaking love the Olympics. It is weird but it seems like my generation isn’t as into the Olympics as I am. Maybe it is my competitive nature but I really enjoy watching the Americans kick ass in a healthy, non-war, way.

This is pretty much the only week that I am sad that I don’t have cable. Hopefully I’ll be able to find the good stuff online. NBC has been talking about how their online presence is going to be HUGE this year, and well it may be bigger than last time but in order to keep profits up, if they broadcast in your area (read: the United States) the only stuff that is online is the stuff not on tv. Which means unless I can somehow make my computer look like it is in Turkmenistan (and I can’t but maybe someone else can…) all I’m going to get online from NBC is Badminton and Handball – actually I may watch those if there is an American team.

Good thing I’m on summer vacation for the next two weeks.

USA vs. Australia

and by that I mean Project Runway. One of the upsides to watching all of your television on the Internet is that you then have access to other countries versions of shows you love and after watching the first three episodes of PR Australia and PR USA I have to say, Australia is kicking our ass.

The Designers: To start things off I can tell the designers apart on the Australian version, there is the gay asian, the gay white boy, the gay asian/australian, the straight guy, the guy who does menswear, the amazing girl, the bitchy-but-thinks-she-is-awesome older lady, the vintage girl, you get my point. On the US version we have the Tannorexic, Daniel (right, there is a Daniel???) and 37 girls with mousy brown hair.

The Challenges: Despite the US trying really hard by going back to the grocery store, 90% of the designers chose to use tablecloths on their first challenge and then we have make a cocktail dress inspired by NY night life, yawn. Hello PR Australia pulling it out with make a sporty, racy outfit out of nothing but car parts? That is why I watch Project Runway.

The Outfits: On the US version we have a whole lot of fug with one or two outfits that could be nice if you just changed 10 things about them. In Australia it is the exact opposite, quite frankly I don't even know how they are choosing who goes home.

The Guest Judges: On the US version we have had Austin Scarlett (ok I'll give you that one), Natalie Portman (who despite being awesome and starting a vegan shoe line knows crap about fashion), and Sandra Bernhard. Really? Sandra Bernhard? Is every single person in the fashion world busy so you had to get Sandra Bernhard? Oooohhhh, she has a one woman show to promote and also knows crap about fashion. Lets see, in Australia we have had two top Australian designers and the fashion director of Harper's Bazaar. I have nothing against celebrity guest judges, both Sarah Jessica Parker and Victoria Beckham were capable of giving insightful feedback but Sandra Bernhard? I really can't forgive that.

The only thing that the US has that Australia doesn't have is Nina, Michael, & Tim and that makes me sad every time I watch it.

I understand that Bravo is pissed about the show moving to Lifetime (who isn't) but put just a teensy bit of effort into, this is the show that has consistently been your top rated program and basically put you on the map. Show some freaking class and get over the Lifetime thing, go out on a high note. Hell, just do it so that when the show tanks on Lifetime you can laugh in their faces and say, "I don't know what your problem is, the show was wonderful on our network." I don't care what your reason is just do better.

The Twilight Series

There are no spoilers in the first two paragraphs so feel free to read those without worry.

Yeah I read it. I couldn’t pass up something like that given my current Vampire phase (Buffy, Moonlight, Jaz Parks’ books…) and the fact that people keep touting it as “bigger than Harry Potter.”

Because the books are constantly being compared to Harry Potter in terms of hugeness and impact on the reading world I’m going to have to address that. Technically both books were written for and marketed to young adults (even children in Harry’s case) and hoped to gain an adult following, both seemed to have accomplished that pretty handily since they’ve sold millions upon millions of copies and quite frankly there aren’t that many children who read. I finished Breaking Dawn in about 10-12 hours over two afternoons and Harry Potter #7 in about 13 straight-can’t-put-it-down-shut-up-don’t-talk-to-me-I’m-reading hours. The difference here is that while I wanted to know what happened in the end to Bella & Edward, you could interrupt me and I would be fine with that. The Twilight series just wasn’t as engrossing as Harry Potter. Another difference, upon finishing Harry Potter (and recovering from that ending) all I wanted to do was read it again because the story was amazing and because I KNOW I missed stuff and would get more out of it a second time. I really don’t feel a need to reread the Twilight series, I don’t think I missed anything and I don’t think anything will be gained by rereading any of the series. It was definitely a Young Adult series – a good one but still, where Harry Potter is arguably (certainly towards the end of the series) an Adult Series that children can enjoy as well.

SPOILERS BEGIN NOW

Now, off of Harry Potter comparisons and onto the books themselves.

Anyone who was in the Jacob camp is an idiot, how could you EVER in a million years think that Jacob could possibly end up with Bella??? I mean seriously, really? You’re stupid, and I think maybe you SHOULD re-read the books because obviously you missed something vitally important. Don’t get me wrong, I love Jacob and I wanted him to be happy, which is how I knew that he was going to imprint on someone because that is the only way he could possibly be happy without Bella. Of course having him imprint on Bella’s vampire-hybrid baby was an awesome little twist that I absolutely loved.

As to Bella & Edward’s vampire-hybrid baby, enjoyed it. Interesting story line to add so that Bella gets to keep some humanity and have those human experiences so yeah, good decision but really my favorite part of the whole pregnancy thing was Jacob. I’ll deal with a slightly out of left field (although who didn’t see it coming as soon as Carlisle told the story about the immortal children???) story arc just for that moment when Bella finds out that Jacob imprinted on “Nessie.”

The ending was OK. Again, wonderful to know that everyone lives happily ever after but who didn’t see that coming? The thing with the Volturi seemed almost like an afterthought, like oh yeah, I the Volturi have to check on Bella, okay, we’ll do it at the end, with little or no build-up and make it slightly lame. I mean they talked the Volturi out of attacking? Happy and unlikely.

In the end, I found the books highly enjoyable but not as amazing as everyone has been going on about. I’m glad I read them but I don’t think I’ll read them again and I’ll see the movie although maybe not in theaters. I’ll probably send my copies to my mom if she wants to read them and I don’t really care about getting them back.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go re-read #6 and #7 in the Harry Potter series because movies are coming out soon and I need to be prepped.

Ahh Work

So my other boss, the one that lives in California but flies out here like every other week is here today. In the office. This means two things for me:

1. Invariably I will sit here bored for hours and then at 2:58pm (I leave at 3pm) he will walk in with a project that needs to be done NOW and sent out to a client. He has known about this project for at least 2 hours and decided not to tell me about it even when I got up and asked him if he needed me to do anything.

2. I have to listen to the Hawaii 5-0 theme song all day. Why? Because his cell phone rings incessantly and that is his ring tone. Yes, I'm serious.

SYTYCD - Week 7

This is going to be short because seriously this was the best part of the evening (and should have been at least 4 times as long).



and this was the second best part of the evening...



and America SUCKS!!!

Seriously, what are you stupid? Those are your two bottom boys and you send Will home? There is no way America can be trusted to pick a president if they can't get such an easy and obvious choice correct.

Plan D?

Have you ever been thwarted at every turn? This is how last saturday went.

Plan A: Go see The Dark Knight
Result: Every showing sold out.

Plan B: Go Mini Golfing
Result: Course was torn down and condos were built.

Plan C: Go kite shopping
Result: Shop closed. Stated Hours on Saturday are 12-5:30, it was 3:30pm.

Plan D: Go find a new game to play together.
Result: Success!!! Of course by this time it was been hours and hours later.

We even had a Plan E and F, just in case. The way the day was going I'm surprised we didn't have to come up with a Plan G.

buc - adj. [buhk]: (1) when internal artistry meets physical expression

You might be thinking to yourself, "what?" And that is what I was thinking almost every time Lil' C opened his mouth last week as guest judge on So You Think You Can Dance. But apparently his job wasn't to judge... "This is what I’m here for…to give you a deeper insight." Okie dokie. Insight away.

"You can’t let that bleed onto the skin of the dance floor, because we can see those wounds and they are deep."
Translation: If you mess up keep going so we don't notice.

"It is a gumball of emotions."
Gumball? Really? I'd have gone jawbreaker maybe, you know because of the layers.

"You guys maintained a nice balance on the fulcrum of character."
Good job?

"You guys are the mediators and the intercessors to communicate and manifest what the choreographers see."
Now THAT is a dancer's job description if I've ever heard one.

"A dancer’s heart is sort of like the mediator’s railroad between music, expression, ingenuity and the dance floor."
I wonder if he knows he used 'mediator' twice.

"It is really difficult to locate the avenue of gain when you are being chauffeured by loss and every opportunity is one step closer to perpetual evolution."
I have no idea what that means but I think it is my favorite.

Oh Lil' C. Come back soon.

SYTYCD - Week 6

Yeah, I skipped a week but all I can remember from that week is Katee & Joshua's Bollywood routine which was loads of fun, go look it up on youtube if you are interested. Also, Comfort was kicked off (finally yay!) but Jessica dropped out due to "injury" (three broken ribs? please girl, take an aspirin and get back out there) and now Comfort is back so week 5 was kind of a wash.

Week 6 though, as far as performances go there was only one. You know how sometimes everything comes together and luck is absolutely 100% on your side? Yeah that is what happened last week when Katee pulled Will's name out of the hat - I believe I remember begging for this - and then Will pulled Pas de Deux out of the hat, and then the Pas de Deux is choreographed by the greatest modern ballet dancer of our (all?) time.

It. Was. Beautiful.

Yeah they messed up at one little part but as Nigel said, if they had danced it perfectly where could they possibly go from there?

What did I hate about it? Try the HORRID musical composition, what was that crap pause in the middle? Talk about disrupting flow.

Results:
Seriously America? You are kicking off Kherington and not Comfort? I know she got a little bitchy backstage last week but I can understand her frustration, the jazz routine was good stuff (although it should have ended with fuetes in unison with Mark like how the dance to the same song ends in Center Stage). I'm not so much sad that Kherington is gone as I am mad that Comfort is still there.

Gev is gone. You thought I'd be happy huh? I was actually a little bit sad, Gev's solos are actually pretty awesome and quite frankly I was emotionally prepared to see Mark go home. I am glad that Mark is still in it though, I like his quirkiness.

My Dream Top 4:
Joshua & Will
Katee & Chelsie

I think Chelsie is the dark horse. I always forget about her - I just had to pause for a minute to remember her name - but I always really enjoy her routines and in fact I can't remember a time that I didn't like her.

Congratulations Kristin!!

One of my closest and oldest friends had her first baby yesterday morning. Congratulations Kristin!! I feel old.

Kristin and I met in 7th grade PE (who knew something good could come of that???) when we both had injuries that required us to sit on the stairs and do nothing while everyone else ran the mile and played paddle tennis. Eventually I got a doctor's note that said I couldn't do anything for over a month so I had to go to the library for "independent study" instead and Kristin recovered and had to run the mile and play paddle tennis but in those times sitting on the stairs we became friends. Strangely we also had 8th grade PE together I think, wasn't that when it was me, Kristin, Krista, & Krystal? Yeah, fun times.

I can't remember why, or whose idea it was, but for some reason we decided to try out for Color Guard together in high school, we both made the team!! (That would seem more amazing if everyone who tried out hadn't made the team but we are ignoring that fact for the time being). By the end of high school we had spent sooooo many hours together, been awarded gold medals together, done countless Spanish projects together, shared leadership positions together, choreographed routines together, and performed and counted upon the other to perform beautifully together.

Despite all that by the end of our Senior year we had drifted a bit, both finding other groups to join outside of Color Guard and after high school we stayed in touch, went to lunch, still enjoyed each other's company and friendship but I was worried that it wasn't the same, that we weren't ever going to be as close and I didn't know how to fix it. Luckily Kristin did, she had what I'll call crazy idea numero uno and asked me to be the maid of honor in her wedding. I didn't cry when she asked, mostly because I was too stunned and honored to form any sort of a reaction but I was happy about it. Pretty much from that moment it felt right again, I felt like I had one of my best friends back and I was excited. I'm still excited that I got to be there on that special day with her (and give an impromptu speech that we decided I didn't have to do but the DJ and wedding Gestapo/coordinator made me do) and that I got to surprise her for her baby shower. I'm excited to go home and meet Luke for the first time even though children don't like me but mostly I'm excited that Kristin and I are close friends again and that she is happy and that she found her husband and that she has her perfect little beautiful baby boy.

I am not excited that I feel old. Kristin, remember how young we once were?

Fortune Cookie - Part 2

Today I got a fortune cookie that says, "You would prosper in the field of medicine."

That is what I'm talking about. Not only is it kind of a fortune (if I was planning on going into the field of medicine) but it is slightly appropriate since I'm studying Chemistry, a field very closely related to going into medicine.

Also, I think this I my mother's way of getting back at me for holding that fortune cookie related grudge since I was 4 years old. My mom always tells me I should be a doctor.

I Made Pretty Blue Sand Today

Ok, technically I made tetraamminecopper(II) sulfate monohydrate but I’m guessing you don’t know what that is. I know what that is and I’m really proud of myself for knowing what that is but for the purposes of this blog I’ll just tell you that it is pretty blue sand that smells like cotton candy. Like REALLY pretty blue sand, like I wanted to take it home in a jar and put it on my dresser because it is a really intense pretty dark royal blue sand and it smells like cotton candy. Unfortunately they made me throw it away in the Acidic Inorganic Waste container under the fume hood. Stupid rules.

I actually really enjoyed school today which is nice because this class has been nothing but discouraging so far. Today's lab was fun and interesting (and even though I wasn't sure, it turns out I did the Pre-Lab questions correctly yessss!) and I even enjoyed today's lecture, it makes me feel a little better about things.

Fortune Cookies

One of my current pet peeves at the moment is fortune cookies that do not contain fortunes. I don’t mean they are empty, I mean they have some bullcrap proverb or saying in them instead of a fortune. When I eat a fortune cookie I want to know that that at some point in the indeterminate future I am going to receive good news in the mail, or that changes in my work lie ahead, that is the whole point to eating a fortune cookie!!!

This was my “fortune” today:

Good Health is Important. Eat Your Vegetables.

W. T. F.????

Ps: Mom, I still totally remember when you lied about my fortune when I was 4 years old. I haven’t forgotten yet. In fact, that may have been when my obsession with the fortunes in fortune cookie began, so yeah, maybe I blame you.

Where's Our Stalker When We Need Him?

There comes a moment when you and your best friend are standing outside staring down at two cars with the hoods open, holding jumper cables, that you realize something. You have no idea what to do now. You just hook it up right? Wait, don't you have to make sure they go the right way or like the battery explodes or something? Oh look directions on the jumper cables....negative ground what? Is the red positive? Does it matter? I don't know. Hang on, I have a manual. Ok it says don't do that. Huh?

Dammit, just call a boy.

Thank you Michael. Kailey's car started and she is on her way to buy a new battery.

SYTYCD - Week 4

This is about last week’s episode that I had to wait until last night to watch because Kailey was out of town.

Favorite of the evening:
Twitchington’s Contemporary: LOVED IT! This was all about Twitch the whole way through.



Runner’s up:
Will & Jessica’s Jazz: Really all because of Will and because I'm a sucker for a clothing trick. I would love to see Will dance with Katee (though I DO NOT want Joshua kicked off) because I think Katee is the only girl that is anywhere near his level of perfection.
Katee & Joshua’s Contemporary: How does Mia Michaels do it? Seriously. How does one person exist with this much creativity week after week???
Chelsie & Mark’s Foxtrot: It was pretty and fun, really enjoyable.

Least Favorite:
Courtney & Gev’s Broadway: Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh. It seemed like the longest routine of the evening and I was bored out of my mind.

Runner Up:
Katee & Joshua’s West Coast Swing: This should have been great. I mean it is K&J being choreographed by Benji! Too bad it was boring and looked like they were marking it the whole way through. But the judges liked it so maybe it was different in studio. The hip thing at the end almost saved it though. Also, Katee’s outfit was horrid. – Speaking of outfits … Wardrobe: meet me at paragraph five.

What. The. Fuck. (sorry mom) was that black and white atrocity that Cat was wearing on Wednesday night????? Slight redemption with Thursday’s red dress and the fact that Mary looked like a normal human being as opposed to a leopard print disco ball but COME ON!!! Those bows made me want to vomit a little.

Results: Really sad to see Kortni go though we were pretty sure that was going to happen once she was put in the bottom three. Really glad to see Nigel not buying into the whole Comfort Love thing that seems to be going on. Just because she is a hip hop dancer doesn’t mean that she shouldn’t have to be amazing in other styles (see Twitch doing contemporary or Joshua doing anything), time to either become awesome or go home. Gev’s solo was amazing so I’m fine with him not going home … this week.

Excuse You

Michael and I went to see Wanted this weekend. I really enjoyed it, of course I tend to enjoy Angelina Jolie’s action roles quite a bit (hello Tomb Raider anyone???) plus it had James McAvoy in it, and I might have a slight movie star crush on him…MAYBE.

Ok, but the weird part is that through the entire movie the girl next to me burped. Like every two minutes. It was pretty quiet, Michael didn’t hear her, but it was a tad distracting. Now, I’m a burper (as Michael is beginning to realize) and I live with a burper (to Renee & Janelle: has she always said “babies” when she burps or is this new?) but every two minutes in a movie theater????? Seems excessive to me.

mm Hmm

So this is what happens when summer happens. TV shows go on hiatus and I am reduced to being excited about a blog (Burn Notice hurry up!!!). A blog with a trailer. Of course it is written and directed by Joss Whedon and stars Nathan Fillion and Neil Patrick Harris so we can safely say that I would be excited about this even during the HEIGHT of the regular TV season.

I give you.....

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog: The Trailer

I Met Myself Today

And I’m a little creeped out by it.

Whose life does this sound like?
Graduated High School in 2000.
Did some college, focusing in History.
Went to work in business and had a good career at a really great company but decided that she didn’t really want to do that for the rest of her life.
Decided to go back to school to get a science related degree.
Moved to Austin because she couldn’t afford to pay rent and work part time while going to school (from DC).
Has a boyfriend getting his Ph.D in computer science.

Um yeah, on top of that. She is the girl who got the other 70% on our last test. Something happened in class today (we were lab partners) and I had a really sarcastic comment about it but I held back because I didn’t really know this girl but then she proceeds to make almost the exact comment. We went to the café to get a drink between lab and class and we have the exact same wallet (Target of course). Oh yeah, and her name is Valerie.

The Pirates of Penzance

Last Thursday Kailey, Scott, Jennie, and I went to see a live show of Gilbert & Sullivan’s Pirates of Penzance. Michael did not go because I am a horrible girlfriend who is not used to having a boyfriend around and so forgot to call and invite him. When I asked him later if he would have even come, he said, “Maybe, but I probably would have resented you for it.” And, I can totally agree with that because it wasn’t awesome.

It wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t awesome. It was … um … adults … in pirate costumes … singing (well!) and acting (some not so well) … on a high school stage. In other words, at times it was a tad uncomfortable and embarrassing to watch. But, we still had fun so a positive experience in the end. Plus, now Kailey and I have added a version starring Kevin Kline as the Pirate King to our netflix so hopefully we’ll enjoy that.

Poo on You

So, I took a Chemistry test on Saturday morning and I got a 70% (technically a 69.5% but we’re rounding got it?) and I was in a pissy mood about it all weekend – I’d like to take this moment to apologize to Michael in case I didn’t hide that as well as I had hoped to :o). So anyway, today I found out that, along with another girl with the same grade, the 70% was actually the highest test score in the class. This should be good news right? No, I’m still annoyed and here is why:

1) No curve. Like not even a little one. So just because it is the highest grade doesn’t mean that my average isn’t still dropping like a rock.

2) This doesn’t give the teacher pause. He isn’t going to explain the concepts in these chapters any better to the next class. He isn’t going to adjust the test to better reflect what is covered in class and on the practice test and he isn’t going to adjust the practice test to reflect what is covered on the test.

3) I studied. Like a lot. Like hours and hours over the course of 4 days and after that I had the practice test DOWN, I could pass that no problem. I could answer the end of chapter questions no problem.

4) Today somebody complained about the test to the teacher before class and we all had to sit through a lecture about how if we studied the end of chapter questions and the practice test and put a “college-level” amount of effort into studying we would do fine on the test. B U L L S H I T.

In good news, the next test (which is next week) already seems like it is going to be easier. I mean, that is if the test actually covers the stuff we learned in class or read in the book, apparently that isn’t a given.

Wade Robson

Ummmmmm, yeah. Wade is talented and has been for a very, very long time. This is 1990, he was 8.



Yeah, he grabs his crotch a lot for an 8 year old but lets notice/remember other things.

1. Michael Jackson was cool in 1990. Especially in places outside the United States.
2. Michael Jackson dancing is NOT easy to do, lots of body isolations.
3. He is 8 and he can do it just as well as Michael!!!

SYTYCD Week 3

Apparently you are going to get a quick rundown of my thoughts on So You Think You Can Dance on a regular basis. Those of you who don't watch the show, I won't feel bad if you skip these but I know of at least three of you who read and watch plus this is my blog and I get to write about whatever I want.

I love Napoleon & Tabitha. I love that there is a hip-hop choreography couple, I love that their names are Napoleon and Tabitha and I love their choreography.

Along that same line, I think that the Chelsie & Mark's hip-hop routine was my favorite this week.



Will - You are a freaking genius! I hate disco but you were amazing.

Katee & Joshua - The one thing I was worried that you guys couldn't do would be Latin ballroom. I was fairly certain you could pull off a a foxtrot or something like that because you have beautiful lines but I was worried about Latin. And you have proved that you can do anything and if I didn't love you so much I would hate you for it.

Comfort - I think you are going home this week.

Gev - You were actually good this week, but I still want you to go home.

Last Week: My favorite part of last week was the Wade Robson group routine. Wade is BY FAR my favorite choreographer on the show and I really hope he does more this season because if Tabitha and Napoleon keep it up with the hip-hop love songs (and a really fun jail break routine) they could catch up.

The Little Things

Today my "PAST DUE" stamp arrived. I could practically squeal with excitement. I can't wait to start stamping invoices. *maniacal laughter*

To be Fair

I talk about my boss a lot, and not usually super stellar things, mostly about how he is computer illiterate, types in ALL CAPS and uses "......." way too much, especially since he usually does ",,,,,,". But to be fair, he is a really nice guy and he buys me lunch a lot and treats me really well as an employee and today he gave me $100 "bonus" for about 15 minutes of work that I did on our website. So yeah, despite all my bitching, I'm happy where I work and with the people I work with and for.

Product Plugs

Normally I wouldn't just plug random products here on this blog (I mean without some sort of financial compensation) but I have recently begun using the following two products and I'm in love. Sorry Boys, these two are really more for the ladies.

Venus Breeze by Gillette - Just awesome, no bumps, no weird redness, super smooth, plus the built-in things means no shaving cream/gel and it actually works!! Downsides: really only good for about three shaves which makes the other downside really suck... Expensive, but I have heard tale that you can get a 12 pack at costco for $20.

Nic's Sticks by OPI - It is almost like painting your nails with dry polish, I know, weird but it works. No drips, no worrying about knocking over the bottle (yes, I have done this), it goes right where you tell it to and it dries really fast. Took about 3 minutes to paint my nails.

So You Think You Can Dance

I freaking LOVE So You Think You Can Dance! And now that Veronica Mars is over and they canceled Moonlight (no, I do not want to talk about it) I need a new television obsession.

My post-vegas week/pre-first week of competition thoughts:
The boys had all better be AMAZINGLY AWESOME if you want me to get over the fact that the Gene Kelly kid didn't make it into the top 20.

My post-first week of competition thoughts:
I am not over the fact that the Gene Kelly kid didn't make it into the top 20.

Loving:
Twitch - it is awesome that he came back this year and he is adorable!
Joshua - the hip hopper with the secret ballet background (we are on to you), boy you can dance!
Kortni Lind - the way you spell your name kinda makes me want to vomit but you are amazing and you seem like someone I would like to hang out with.
Comfort - you crack me up!

Already Annoyed By:
Gev - go home. seriously. all the way back to Kazakhstan. I don't know why but I do not like you.

Favorite Dance this Week BY FAR:

Trip Home

It was so nice to go home for a week even though I missed my puppy and my (ahem) boyfriend - shut up - it was really awesome to see my family and friends while I was there.

Highlights:
I got a sunburn on my first day there because it was actually cool enough to sit outside long enough to get a sunburn. By cool I mean low 80's so everyone who lives in SB was complaining about the heat but I was thoroughly enjoying not getting heat stroke by stepping outside.

I went to Kinko's with my mom and I got to teach her how to make double sided copies, you are never to old to learn something new. We got to have this conversation too:
Mom: "so it copies both sides and prints on both sides?"
Me: "yep."
Mom: "does it collate the copies?"
Me: "we are only making one copy, it doesn't need to collate." [It was a multi-page document though]
Mom: [pulls out finished copy] "yea huh! see it didn't collate them, this is the back page!"
Me: [takes the stack of paper, turns it over] "now it is the front page."
Then she walked into a wall while we were heading back to the car.
Ahhh family.

I got to ride around in my mom's new car - sorry bmw - I forget that we aren't allowed to refer to it simply as a 'car'.

I went to the zoo!
Gen & I as caged animals...


and my name was on the wall!!!


And the whole reason that I went to SB on this particular weekend and skipped school was for Kristin's Baby Shower! She didn't know I was coming and I think it was a big surprise. It was super awesome to see her and Allison again. We played silly games that included looking at pieces of chocolate melted into diapers to guess what kind of candy it was.
I'm the not Asian one.


Michael picked me up at the airport and when we were trying to figure out how to get out of the parking lot the little bar (you know the one i'm talking about??) came down on his car and it shouldn't have been funny but it was really funny. To me at least. It could have been a lack of sleep. Oh and just so you all know, I did actually make him cupcakes for his birthday and took him kayaking and took him to lunch, it wasn't just a trip to Sonic. I am a good girlfriend!

I'm Back!

I was on vacation for a week. Did you notice? I sure did. The reason I didn’t tell you before is that I went home to California for Kristin’s baby shower and it was kind of a surprise and she reads the blog so I had to keep my mouth shut. It was hard.

I almost told her like ten times, not because I was so excited and I wanted to tell her (though that is true) but I really had to bite my tongue (or more specifically erase IMs before pressing send) because the following sentences actually got fully typed before I realized who I was talking to:

- “ugh, I can’t wait to go home next week, I really need a vacation”

- “I’m super excited for Beachside salmon!!” (her shower was at The Beachside)

- “ok I’m an idiot, so I made a list of all the things I needed to do before I leave and I totally didn’t put packing on the list.”

Pictures and more stories to come later but here is what I’ve done since returning to Texas.

1. Took my (ahem) boyfriend to Sonic for his birthday dinner because I am a super awesome girlfriend.

2. Killed two, yes TWO, wasps IN my apartment.

3. Called the Volkswagen dealership because my check engine light is on…again. I think they could hear the displeasure in my voice.

Strip Club

Did that get your attention? The other day my mom and dad told me that they thought they were getting an edited version of my blog well you aren't.

Ok ok, I did not go to the strip club but I do have to drive by one semi-regularly now since someone lives in north Austin, the land of strip clubs, pawn shops, and liquor stores. The Yellow Rose is apparently a famous strip club but what I like is the sign, the person in charge of it is quite creative. When I first started going up there it said "DANCES ARE CHEAPER THAN GAS" but now we have this...



gives whole new meaning to stimulus check ... ha ... ha ... ha. get it?

For the record (and don't tell Michael because I'll never live it down) I actually don't totally hate his neighborhood, it isn't quite as residential as mine but it isn't as bad as I make it seem above and it is near EVERYTHING as opposed to here where there isn't a whole lot to do within a 15 minute drive.

I Think I'm Behind on my YouTubing

You have probably seen this but Michael just showed it to me for the first time this weekend and I'm totally in love with it.

If you haven't seen it yet make sure you watch the whole thing and yes something does happen it just takes a minute.

Simon got a Haircut

It was time for a summer cut. Yes I realize that this isn't the most awesome of pictures but he will sit absolutely still right up until the moment the shutter is released so just getting one of him looking at the camera is a feat.



Also notable in this picture.... That is Michael's hand! :o) And yes, I know that is a cop out as far as pictures go but I hate just taking pictures. Someday the stars will align and I will be carrying my camera while we do something picture worthy.

Today I received the title on my car. I've been paying for it for five years and now it is truly 100% mine.

I'm not sure if this is her trying to rub all her problems in my face or her forgiving me. It could perhaps all be a coincidence that all these problems arose as I was making my final payment since technically she is an inanimate object but I highly doubt that.

Great. Thanks.

So, among other things, I took my car to the dealership yesterday to be fixed. I was told on the phone that it was going to take about 1.5 hours and (if that check engine light code is correct) cost about $300.

I spent the night at my (ahem) boyfriend's house because the dealership is about 2 minutes from his house and about 30 minutes from my house and this way I wouldn't have to get up as early, plus it was a good sleepover excuse. I drop off my car at 10:30am and think that I should be getting a call around 1pm to pick it up. They call at 11:30ish to tell me what we thought was wrong wasn't actually and really it is these other 2 things and oh yeah we should probably fix this thing while we're at it or you're just going to have to come back and it should be done by 4pm and your total is going to be $426.83. Great. Thanks. (those of your who don't know me as well, those last two words should be read with the utmost of sarcasm).

Later that afternoon I pick up my car at like 3:30 (yay for being done early) and my wonderful (ahem) boyfriend waits with me while it takes them like an hour to bring it around. Finally I'm on my way home. About 25 minutes into my 30 minute drive home my temperature light starts beeping and flashing at me. I call them, they say bring it back, probably just a bubble in the coolant line, we'll fill it up and you'll be on your way. Great. Thanks. (see above regarding these two words).

The following ensues when I arrive.

My Personal Service Advisor, Brant, pops the hood. "Yeah, you're almost out of coolant, let me grab some."
Pours in coolant, we watch the level drop back to nothing.
Brant: "hm, looks like you've got a leak in your coolant system."
Me: "there wasn't one there this morning." (as kindly as possible I swear)
Brant with flashlight: "yeah see it there pooling on your transmission"
Me: "mmhmm" but thinking - so that's where my transmission is, interesting.
Brant looks at me like he expects me to do something about it.
I look at Brant like what do you expect me to do about that?
Brant: "Ok, let me take it in the back and we'll see if it is something we can fix right up. Not sure though since we didn't touch your transmission or coolant system today. Have a seat in the lounge."

an hour later

Brant: "So your temperature sensor just popped off, we went ahead and fixed that right up for you and drove it around you are good to go." in a tone that implies they have done me a favor.
Me: "My temperature sensor popped off?"
Brant: "Yep" smiles.
Seems odd that this would randomly happen on the exact same day that I had my car worked on, wait a minute, where have I heard the words temperature sensor recently...
Me: "hang on."
I dig out my receipt from earlier
QTY: 1
DESC: tempsensor
PRICE: $25.87
Me: "do you mean that the temperature sensor that you installed earlier today 'popped off'?"
Brant (no longer smiling): "Ummmmm. yes."
Me: "ah. and now it isn't going to do that?"
Brant: "No. our shop foreman checked it all out."
Me: "Great. Thanks."

10 Reasons I Know I'm Not a Grown-Up

- I went to 3 stores and called 3 more to find the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Box set because I couldn't wait for it to ship from Amazon.com.

- I miss my mommy and daddy.

- I call them 'mommy' and 'daddy'.

- There is never a time when candy doesn't sound like a good idea.

- I want to be a secret agent when I grow up.

- There are more toys than books on my bookshelves.

- I choose my breakfast cereal by what is being given away.

- My socks have Tinkerbell and Mickey Mouse on them.

- I can and do skip semi-regularly.

- On every birthday I wonder if this is the year I get my magical powers.