No, that it Karma

So I regularly read the FMyLife blog. It used to be funny, now it seems to be filled with people who don't understand what Karma is.

Too many of the posts seems to follow this pattern:

Today, I was walking/driving along and thought I'd do something totally rude/mean/completely uncalled for because I thought it might amuse me then it somehow backfired on me. FML

Examples:
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Nope, not FYL, you totally deserved to be chased with a knife.

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
I would have clapped too. So would most of the people I know. That is why I'm friends with them and not you.

Today, I had just gotten a milkshake with some friends. We were about to drive past my Ex's house, so I though it would be funny to throw the milkshake in his yard. Turns out if your going 50mph and try to throw a shake out the window, it comes all back in. FML
Wondering what the definition of Karma is? Right there baby.

Today, I had a date with this guy. I waited at the restaurant for an hour and he didn't show. Thinking he stood me up, I went over to his place and keyed his car. Then I realized the date was for tomorrow. FML
How that one should go: Today, I was thinking about a date that I had planned and getting really excited about it because I was really into her. I went outside and she had keyed my car because I didn't show up. The date is scheduled for tomorrow. FML

This Gets me EVERY TIME

All the pedigree commercials starring this dog, Oliver, cause me to tear up. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that Oliver and Simon look similar and seeing him in a shelter cage makes me want to cry. The fact that there are like five commercials starring this dog and they are played ALL THE TIME on hulu, which is the only place I see commercials.



I'll admit it. These are incredibly persuasive for me. I think about buying pedigree every time because it will save Oliver. Then I remember what a terrible dog food it is and instead the next time I go to PetCo I buy an extra bag of dog food to give to the rescue workers outside.

So, I picked this particular week to visit Santa Barbara because Allison was getting married.

Isn't she pretty


Kristin was in the wedding too and also looked pretty.


Since the wedding was at the Zoo (my favorite place) we got to wander around. Unfortunately the Lions were going inside right at the exact moment we arrived (SOMEONE just HAD to read the sign about the plants that absolutely wasn't going anywhere) but I did get what I thought was a terrible picture of the Gorilla until Michael looked at it and said, "Gorillas in the mist" and now I love it.

The "mist" is really my flash reflecting off the glass.

I also made Michael ride the train. I'm not exactly sure what the reason is for this level of annoyance but there are three options that I can think of:
1. That I'm making him ride a tiny zoo train.
2. The three REALLY annoying girls sitting a couple rows in front of us (one actually almost started crying because only two people can fit on the bench and she had to sit a row behind them, these were teenagers.)
3. That I'm taking a picture of him from 5 inches away while making him ride a tiny zoo train.


But I was right about it being fun, because after the train ride, he was ALLLLLLLL better.

Close Call

I almost had a heart attack while driving to work this morning. So I'm listening to the radio and they start talking about some local news items that are popping up and one story goes like this.

Girl: Does anyone here actually take out books from the library?
(Me to myself: I do all the time)
Guys: No, no, no, sometimes my wife takes my daughter.
Girl: Ok so there is a story about a local woman in her twenties that now has a warrant out for her arrest because she didn't return a library book and the fees got so much that the city wants to arrest her.
(Me to myself: hmm, I have like $2.00 in fees that I haven't paid, I should get on that apparently)
Guys: wow, she can't just buy a new copy of the book or something?
Girl: Apparently the judge said it has gone on too far and issued the warrant. Yeah, her name is Victoria Ro ummm hang on, Victoria Roberts.

Seriously in that "hang on" moment I was FREAKING OUT.

Here is the story if anyone is interested. TUrns out she is actually in Killeen which is a little north of here.

After Michael FINALLY got to Santa Barbara we decided to take in I Madonari to kill some time. I said that it was within walking distance but definitely far enough away that you wouldn't feel silly driving there. Apparently I wasn't clear because by the time we were starting to leave Michael clarified that our "walk" was in fact a "death march."

Despite the fact that I'm pretty sure this year's theme was "Let your kid draw the square" there were a few that I liked.







This was the one Michael said was his favorite and I guess I believe him but well, you decide.



And amidst the fine art reproductions and tributes to firefighters there was this...



Not that I don't love Mickey, but lets just say that this one stood out and not necessarily in a good way.

Puppy Love

As much as I hate flying with Simon, he sure loves being in Santa Barbara, especially with Zoe being there now and it means he gets to play with my brother's dog, Saturn.

Simon and Saturn never stop moving, they always have to see what the other one is up to and usually try to steal whatever it is the other is playing with. This is actually the best picture I have of the two of them (most of the pictures had no dogs in them at all because they kept running off to play or investigate some noise). I kind of love it actually.



When Saturn wasn't around Simon enjoyed some outdoor relaxing. We don't really have any outdoor space that he can hang out in and he LOVES being outside so having a yard was really fun for him (also awesome for me because it meant I didn't have to walk him at 7am).



We went to see Zoe as well, who chased the frisbee while Simon watched. I think he is still exhausted from playing with Saturn, he hasn't had this much play time in a while.





Between Zoe, Saturn, and Piper (Scott's dog) we're pretty sure that Simon is going to think he is only allowed to play with little, black dogs.

I also noticed one more thing while at home. Simon totally goes with my parent's furniture.

New Plates

Last week I went home to California for a wonderful visit* that even included a certain boyfriend joining me for a few days.

Before leaving Michael did some man's work for me and put on my new license plates, yes I now have stupid Texas plates.



Of course when I went out to my car this afternoon for the first time since being back I realized that I had left it unlocked when I got the new plates out of the car before I left. Yeah, my car was sitting unlocked for over a week. I'm awesome.



*Of course it could have been slightly improved by Gen not being in stupid Mexico.